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Wednesday, June 20, 2018

PROMO: You Only Live Once


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Humorous Thriller
Date Published: March 21, 2018
Publisher: Imajin Books

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On sale for .99 from June 15-30th


Synopsis: James Flynn is an expert shot, a black belt in karate, and irresistible to women. He’s also a heavily medicated patient in a Los Angeles psychiatric hospital. Flynn believes his locked ward is the headquarters of Her Majesty’s Secret Service and that he is a secret agent with a license to kill.

When the hospital is acquired by a new HMO, Flynn is convinced that the Secret Service has been infiltrated by the enemy. He escapes to save the day, and in the process, Flynn kidnaps a young Hispanic orderly named Sancho.

This crazy day trip turns into a very real adventure when Flynn is mistaken for an actual secret agent. Paranoid delusions have suddenly become reality, and now it’s up to a mental patient and a terrified orderly to bring down an insecure, evil genius bent on world domination.


About the Author

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Haris Orkin is a novelist, playwright, screenwriter, and game writer. His play, Dada was produced at The American Stage and the La Jolla Playhouse. Sex, Impotence, and International Terrorism was chosen as a critic’s choice by the L.A. Weekly and sold as a film script to MGM/UA. His original screenplay, A Saintly Switch, was directed by Peter Bogdanovich and starred David Alan Grier and Vivica Fox. He is a WGA Award and BAFTA Award nominated game writer and narrative designer known for Command and Conquer: Red Alert 3, Call of Juarez: Gunslinger, Tom Clancy’s The Division, Mafia 3, and Dying Light, which to date has sold over 7.5 million copies.



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On sale for .99 from June 15-30th





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Tuesday, June 19, 2018

Blog Tour: Trazer: Kids of a Stolen Tomorrow



Young Adult Sci-fi
Date Published: 10/18/17
Publisher: YorubaBoy Books

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It's the year 93 O.O., and Dara Adeleye is a student with a bright future and her life figured out. That is, until a chance encounter with a mysterious child changes everything.

Dara lives in a world shaped by the Miracle of Elegua, an intervention by the gods in the fate of an Earth on the brink of collapse decades before she was born. Exceptionally gifted as an artist, her day-to-day attentions are on excelling in school in order to rise above her lower-class upbringing and raise her friends and family out of the dreaded red vanes. But Earth is headed towards the brink again and it may just be the gift she doesn't know she has that can save it . . .

Kristano Arvelo is a trazer--the term used for the graffiti writers of Dara's time, a once-slang that originated in her home town of Todirb Wall. The aimless leader of a local group of trazers, he may hold a key to unlocking Dara's hidden gifts. But it will come at the cost of the destiny she believed was hers.


About the Author



JOSEPH OLUMIDE ADEGBOYEGA-EDUN was born in Lagos, the then-capital city of Nigeria.  A great-grandson of  the First-Secretary of the Egba United Government, he was brought to the United States at age two when his parents came to study. Increasing corruption in the Nigerian government followed by the return of military rule thwarted their plans to move back and America became home. They set roots in Brooklyn, New York, a vibrant environment colored with graffiti and steeped in elements of hip-hop that left an indelible mark on the future author's consciousness. 


The cultural influences and experiences of his homeland and the city of his early youth have been a strong source of creative inspiration for the author. Trazer: Kids of Stolen Tomorrow is his debut novel, and the first entry in the Trazer Series. When not writing, Joe enjoys working on other projects with his creative partners  LenStorm, 7Woundz and Soundz, and exploring the breathtaking wilderness of the Chesapeake.


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Sunday, June 17, 2018

PROMO: Reclaimed


Contemporary Romance
Date Published: May 30, 2018

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Beyond all else, Samira Foster wanted one thing: Elliot Dowling. He was her passion, her need. They were just kids but she knew it was real. The way he kissed her; the way he held her. Yet he’s the one thing that was denied her. The scion of a powerful and wealthy family, she’s now the head of Foster Acquisitions. But she doesn’t have it all. The pressure, the demands, the wolves. And she’s all alone. She needs someone. She needs him. And she’ll have him … even if it destroys her.



 Excerpt


Elliot slowly began to realize that, despite the adrenaline flooding his system, nothing had truly changed since he had walked away years ago. He had to fight not to reminisce of the days they spent together, whether it was at the park, the lake or hiking the trails while the world waited back in the city. She was still the perfect girl, and now woman, that every man dreamed of, and he knew that she had no business slumming it with the likes of him. Samira’s eyes started to glow in the same way they used to when she looked at him. She could see deep into his soul, all of his feelings, and right now he wondered if she knew the truth.

“I almost gave up hope trying to find you,” she said. “It’s been years since you disappeared. I was beginning to think I would never see you again. Then the name Dowling Holdings came across my desk and I heard you’d returned. Why didn’t you reach out to me?”

“I thought about it, but there’s things…”

“I know.” Samira nodded. Her smile faded slightly, but she suppressed the frustration that Elliot knew she must’ve been feeling. “I had my investigators do a complete work up on Dowling Holdings. The only thing they can’t tell me is why you left. Was it because of what your father did?”

Elliot shook his head, he was certain there were things no one could know, and truthfully said, “My father’s actions might have held something over me at one point, but that doesn’t shadow my decisions anymore.”

Samira looked confused, then sad for a split second. “Was it me? Did you not reach out because of something that I did?”

Elliot once again shook his head. “God no, Sam, you’re amazing!”

He watched something click in her head, and even though he had never told her what happened that night, she figured it out.

“It was my dad then,” she said. “He never approved of us; even if he never told me, I knew that he hated the thought of us together. Did he threaten you? Forbid you from seeing me?”

Elliot could not look at her. Samira’s face flushed with anger as she continued, “Two and a half billion dollars in profit last year from a holding company that you built yourself. If you can’t see how impressive that is, I would be shocked! That was your hard work and determination! If my dad was even alive, he would not have a leg to stand on to keep us apart.”

“Sam, I wanted everything to be just right, or at least, cleaned up…”

Samira stood up. “No, Elliot. I don’t believe you. Everything you’ve gone through, everything you’ve built, doesn’t matter. You’ve let him stand between us for all these years. He was my father, and no matter what he said, I was never afraid of him or let him run my life. You could have everything you want now, but instead you just keep trying to prove yourself to a dead man.”

Samira got up, clearly upset, and headed for the door.

Every part of him wanted to run after her, and take her into his arms again, but where would they go from here? He saw now how crazy it was to bring her back into his dark world again.




About the Author

Marcella Swann has been putting words on paper for as long as she can remember. After working for years in the hard-edged world of journalism, she now devotes her time to writing contemporary romance stories of strong-willed women who win the men of their desires.

As passionate about love as the beauty of a story well told, Marcella is a complete romantic and believes everyone desires their happily ever after.

A small-town girl from Louisiana, Marcella now lives in New York City and starts each day walking her Yorkie in the park. She also swings a mean kettle bell at the gym and loves Karaoke nights with her friends.


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Saturday, June 16, 2018

PROMO: Snafu Fubar: Nothing Heroic


Adult Humor
Date Published: Oct 2016

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*****WARNING*****
If you are easily offended, then this is NOT the book for you. Please put it down and back away slowly. However, if you have a warped sense of humor, please read on.

In the town of Lost Hope, Florida reside two heroes unlike any others. These champions of justice go by the names of Snafu Fubar and General Nuisance. Nightly they patrol their fine city to protect it from evil's grasp. And by 'patrol' we mean they sit on a porch, appropriately nicknamed 'The Fucking Nuisance Cave', drinking beers, smoking cigars, and talking about sex.


Excerpt


   Meanwhile, across the street from the trailer park, in a convenience store that General Nuisance and Snafu Fubar frequented, a robber had just entered, brandishing a pistol.  He pointed it at the clerk behind the counter, a young boy who had not yet reached legal drinking age and who still had a zit party in full swing on his chubby face. “Put your hands in the air and give me the money!” The clerk looked confused for a moment and then shrugged.

    “I can’t do both.”

    “Huh...what?”

   The clerk rolled his eyes. “I can’t put my hands in the air and give you the money.”

    “Fine. Put one hand in the air and hand me the money with the other one.” The robber gestured with the gun.

   “OK, which hand?”

    “Right…no, wait a minute. Left.”

    “Left hand up or left hand get the money?”

     The robber banged his head against the counter three times and glared at the clerk. “Left hand get the money.”

    Ding Ding.

      The robber and clerk both looked toward the store's door, through which a female customer had just entered. She was blond, with a great body and nice rack, but her face was ugly as sin. “Can I get twenty on pump five?”

    The robber stepped towards her, motioning with the gun. “Lie down on the floor now!”

   “What? Really? Have you seen this floor? I’d probably have a higher chance of survival if you just shoot me. I think I’ll take my chances!”

    The robber glanced down at the floor. “OK. Point taken. Just sit on the floor.”

    “Really wish I hadn’t picked today to wear stilettos and this damn mini skirt with no panties,” griped the customer. “I mean, if I’m going to catch an STD, I really wanted to do it the fun way.” She looked about as graceful as a giraffe on roller skates as she tried several maneuvers to get down on the floor without giving the clerk and the robber their own private peep show.



    General Nuisance met Snafu in the parking lot of the convenience store. They did the handshake, the fist bump, the high five, the gang sign, the chest bump and the butt slap — to which they both said in unison, “NO GO HOMO!” This, of course, made it perfectly acceptable for two grown men to slap each other on the ass.

    “Do you see what I see?” General Nuisance pointed into the convenience store that held his beloved beer.

    “Yeah, some idiot sitting on a disease ridden floor.  Hope she knows there are more enjoyable ways to catch an STD.”

    “I agree, but I wasn’t talking about her. Look again…a robber!”

     “Cool! You wanna hand out some Bronze Age justice?”

       General Nuisance poked his friend in the arm. “I got one better...Iron Age justice, huh, huh?”

    “Oh, that’s just stupid! What did the Iron Age have that the Bronze Age didn’t?”

    “Really? Asia was smelting tin and brass by then…you can’t top that. What was your Bronze Age doing? Cave men were still circle jerking on dinosaurs' corpses.”

     “That’s the Stone Age, you idiot.” Snafu shook his head. “You can be so dumb at times.”

      While Snafu Fubar and General Nuisance debated over the kind of justice they were going to hand out, things inside the store took a bizarre turn.

     “Man, my drawer is gonna be off. I’m gonna have to overcharge all my customers tonight,” the clerk whined as he looked down at his till.

     “Shut up! Just get the money,” screamed the robber.

   “I don’t feel so well,” said the female customer, whose face was now a sickly shade of green. She burped once then farted. A moment later, she puked all over the floor and shit herself.

     “Crap! Now I’m going to have to mop the floor and man, I was really hoping to leave that for the morning shift. I mean I could kind of push everything under the candy counter. There’s a good chance no one would notice and I could just place a wet floor sign where she is at. Yeah…the more I think about it, I’m pretty sure that would work.”

      “Oh my God! Why are you taking so long?” The robber pointed the gun at the clerk again.

     The store's door swung open. Loud rock music blared as Snafu and General Nuisance entered the store. “I’m here to kick some ass and hand out –“, Snafu sighed, “Industrial Revolution era justice!”

     “See?!? Was that so hard?” General Nuisance asked with a smile.

      The robber grabbed the clerk by his shirt collar. “This is why you should have moved faster. Both of you get down on the ground now…or the clerk dies.”

       General Nuisance and Snafu both looked down at the female customer who was now shaking and in the midst of some kind of convulsion. “Yeah, that’s just not going to happen,” Snafu said.

    “Son, put the gun down.” General Nuisance spoke as calmly as a man being threatened with sitting on a disease-ridden floor could speak.

    “How about I shoot you?!” screamed the frustrated robber as he pointed the gun first at General Nuisance then at Snafu.

     “Yeah, shoot those costumed freaks!” chimed in the clerk.

      “You stay out of this!” the robber yelled at the clerk.

     “Why are you rooting for the robber?” asked Snafu.

     “I don’t know…just seemed like we were connecting…I don’t get a lot of social interaction here.”

     The robber looked back and forth between the costumed vigilantes and the clerk. “Shit! I don’t know who to shoot first!”

     “Please God, let it be me! Bleck!” said the customer on the floor as she puked again.

     “Well, while you decide that, I’m going to grab a Slushee,” Snafu said as he strolled toward the back of the store.

     “Yeah. Me too. Let’s grab the beer and some beef jerky while we’re at it,” General Nuisance said as he patted the robber on the shoulder and walked past him.

     The robber snatched the money from the clerk's hand and ran out of the store. “Ya’ll are fuckin’ crazy!”

     The clerk, looking as though he'd just lost his best friend or a beloved pet, leaned over the edge of the counter.

     “Call me...I mean if you want to hang out or something,” the clerk yelled as the robber made his escape. When he didn’t get a response, the clerk slumped back against his stool.

     “They never call.”



About the Author


Bob Dixon is a two-time Guinness World Record holder for the World's Longest Cartoon Strip. He is the author and creator of a number of comic book titles for Pocket Change Comics, including Assassinette: The Mind Stalker, Psyco Duck, Jester's Dead, The Holy Knight, Riplash, Shadow Slasher, and Warzone 3719. Bob has written two children books, Rooty the Tree Troll and Holiday Bunny; two young adult books, Mouch and Company: The Dream Psychic and Rags and Ruins; An adult humor book Snafu Fubar : Nothing Heroic; and is the co-author of Will Jones' biography A Tough Call. Bob is also the Writer/Director of the movie Dr. Prozak's Office. Additionally, he is a certified special education teacher who works with children who have autism and intellectual delays.


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Wednesday, June 13, 2018

Blog Tour: The Place Where We Belong







General Literary Fiction /Self-Help Fiction
Date Published: March, 2018

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Why is starting over so complicated? After an amicable divorce, Tamara is ready to move on. She has loving friends, a meaningful job and a comfortable life. And yet, while everything seems to be in its correct place, she has the distinct feeling that nothing is as it should be. Feeling like she is losing control, Tamara struggles to answer a really difficult question: what does she really want? The Place Where We Belong is a novel about self-acceptance, belonging, friendship and love.



EXCERPT

The next day at the Nest, I am doing paperwork in my office. Miriam is cooking up a storm in our tiny kitchenette. Smells of couscous and soup waft through the apartment. She brings me some steaming tea with mint leaves, lemon and honey. “You look like you need this, sweetheart,” she says. “Come and talk to me when you are done.”
“I sure will,” I say. “I just have to sift through some things before rush hour. Rush hour is when the kids come to the Nest after the school day is done. My phone rings. I don’t recognize the caller.
“Hi,” I say, “Tamara speaking.”
“Hi Tamara,” an accented voice speaks to me. “It turns out that I am more impatient than I thought.”
“Who is this?” I ask.
“It is Mike. You rammed into me on the sand the other day on the beach.” The guy from the restaurant.
“I didn’t ram into you: we bumped into each other,” I respond.
“Whatever. I am sure Freud wouldn’t agree. There are no coincidences.”
“I refuse to argue over this.”
“Then don’t, let’s just discuss it like two adults. Over some ice cream.”
“Ice cream?”
“You don’t eat ice cream? That is going to be a problem for me.”
“Of course I eat ice cream. Everyone eats ice cream.”
“Good, so it’s settled.”
“What’s settled?”
“We meet tonight at ten o’ clock.”
“Tonight at ten o’ clock, I will be sleeping.”
“You can sleep another time; tonight we eat ice cream.”
“Don’t you have a restaurant to run?”
“I don’t have to be there all the time, but thanks for your concern.”
“Have I given you any reason to think that I am interested in you?”
“None whatsoever.”
“So why are you doing this?”
“I like a challenge. I like to break down resistance. So will you be there?”
“I don’t know where ‘there’ is. I don’t know.”
“I will send you the address. See you later.” Mike hangs up.

About the Author



R. K. Mayer was born in Cape Town, South Africa. She has been a teacher, a technical writer and a product manager. Her most short-lived job was in a clothes shop, where she lasted a grand total of two and a half hours. Her last "real job" was being a manager of some wonderful people across the globe, as well as being a lead and advocate for digital transformation in the software industry. Since leaving the corporate world, she is now a Change Management consultant, blogger, novelist and a serial volunteer in her community. In her novels, R. K. Mayer combines her understanding and perspective about how people are affected by change, and her love for storytelling.

R. K. Mayer lives in Israel with her husband and three children. Her latest novel is "The Place Where We Belong." Her first published novel was: "The Perfection of the Glass Lemons."

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PROMO: The Busy Moms Guide to Writing


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Self-Help
Publisher: Fayette Press
Date Published: 03/30/2018

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Are you a busy mom who loves to write, but doesn't know where to start? This easy-to-read guide by two bestselling, award-winning authors will help you make your writing dreams a reality.

From finding time to write, to showing you how to get your kids involved, Jamie Foley and Angela Castillo (who happen to be busy moms themselves) will give you the resources--and the encouragement--you need.

This book will:
- Help you plan out your writing goals, time management, and financial budget
- Encourage you to enlist aid from the right people--critique partners, editors, cover designers, and more
- Guide you to making the best decision for you regarding independent and traditional publishing
- Give you questions to ask yourself at the end of each chapter to help you move closer to your writing dreams
- Steer you away from common mistakes


Excerpt

Supper should have been started half an hour ago, and a pile of laundry waits for you on the couch (well, it used to--now the kids have flung the clothes across the room in a free-for-all sock fight). Your baby is crying, and your oldest kid is yelling something about a science fair project being due tomorrow.

But what are you thinking about? A roving mercenary princess in your own made up land--the land of Flynn. You’ve dreamed about this land, pretended to live in it yourself. And more than anything, you want to write about it.

Your little girl grabs hold of your leg with sticky fingers. “Mommy, when are we going to have supper? I’m hungry, Mommy!”

If you’re feeling tempted to check your home for a hidden camera, the reason we know these things is because we are there. We have nights like this on a continual basis. Yet between both of us, we have fifteen published books (and three collections). These books help to generate an income to help with grocery money and even, sometimes, the mortgage payment. Writing and Momming can happen! At the same time!



What this book will do:

·         Help you plan out your writing goals and time management

·         Give you tools to do your personal best when it comes to writing

·         Steer you away from mistakes we’ve made

·         Encourage you to enlist aid from the right people--critique partners, editors, cover designers, and more

·         Help you create a time budget, as well as a financial budget, so you don’t go overboard

·         Guide you to making the best decision for you regarding independent and traditional publishing

·         Give you questions to ask yourself (and hopefully answer!) at the end of each chapter to help you move closer to your writing dreams



What this book won’t do:

·         Teach you how to write a New York Times bestseller (if you find a book that can do this, let us know)

·         Tell you to neglect your family in order to write

·         Expect you to have a ten-thousand-dollar budget for your first book

·         Tell you how to come up with writing ideas. There are countless other writing prompt books available out there. We figure if you picked up this book, you probably have ideas buzzing around in your head already and are looking for a way to let them out.

·         Give you a magic formula to make millions of dollars with your books (we don’t believe such a thing exists, but maybe. Of course, unicorns might exist too…)



About the Authors

Angela Castillo

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Angela Castillo loves living in the small town of Bastrop Texas, and draws much of her writing inspiration from life there. She loves to walk in the woods and shop in the local stores. Castillo studied Practical Theology and Music at Christ for the Nations in Dallas, Texas. She was home-schooled all through high school and is the oldest of 7 kids. Castillo's greatest joys are her little girl and two boys. Castillo has been published in The First Line, Aardvark's Ark, Heartwarmers, Thema, and several other publications, and also has works available on Amazon in paperback and Kindle format.


Jamie Foley

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Jamie Foley loves strategy games, home-grown berries, and Texas winters. She's terrified of plot holes and red wasps.

Her husband is her manly cowboy astronaut muse. They live between Austin, TX and their family cattle ranch, where their hyperactive spawnling and wolfpack can run free.





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Giveaway

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Tuesday, June 12, 2018

PROMO: Jane's Baby


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Thriller
Date Published: June 1, 2018
Publisher: Intrigue Publishing

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Whatever happened to Jane Roe's baby? Norma McCorvey, of Caddo-Comanche heritage, did not terminate the pregnancy that led her to become the anonymous plaintiff of the landmark U.S. Supreme Court women's rights case Roe v Wade because in 1971, when the motion was first argued, abortion in the U.S. was illegal. The Jane Roe real-life child would now be a woman in her late forties, the potential of her polarizing celebrity unknown to her. A religious rights splinter group has blackmailed its way into learning the identity of the Roe baby, the product of a closed adoption. To what end, only a new Supreme Court case will reveal. Tourette's-afflicted K9 bounty hunter Judge Drury, a Marine, stands in the way of the splinter group's attempt at stacking the Supreme Court via blackmail, murder, arson, sleight of hand, and secret identities.



About the Author

“The thing I write will be the thing I write.” Chris wouldn’t trade his northeast Philadelphia upbringing of street sports played on blacktop and concrete, fistfights, brick and stone row houses, and twelve years of well-intentioned Catholic school discipline for a Philadelphia minute (think New York minute but more fickle and less forgiving). He’s had lengthy stops as an adult in Michigan and Connecticut, thinks Pittsburgh is a great city even though some of his fictional characters don’t, and now lives in Doylestown, PA. He’s married, the father of two, is a grandfather, still does all his own stunts, and he once passed for Chip Douglas of My Three Sons TV fame on a Wildwood, NJ boardwalk. As C.G. Bauer he’s also the author of SCARS ON THE FACE OF GOD, an EPIC Awards runner-up for best in 2010 eBook horror, and the editor of the CRAPPY SHORTS short story collections.



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