When the Life You’ve Built Still Isn’t Enough and How to Restore What Actually Matters
Christian Living / Religion / Nonfiction
Date Published: August 4, 2026
Publisher: Lucid Books Publishing
You’ve worked hard, built a good life, and achieved what you set out to accomplish. So why does something still feel off?
On the surface, everything looks right. But underneath, something is beginning to crack—and no amount of success, performance, or achievement seems to fix it.
Josh Wintermute knows that feeling well. After walking through physical, mental, financial, and spiritual struggles, he came to a life-changing realization: the problem wasn’t just the circumstances—it was the foundation.
In this honest and practical book, Josh walks you through the three foundational areas every life is built on—your heart, your home, and your culture. He helps you uncover what’s broken beneath the surface, do the hard work of restoration, and rebuild on what truly matters.
I still remember the look on my son’s face when he told me he scored his first soccer goal. He was so excited as he told me what happened and how happy his coach and teammates were. My wife was beaming as he shared the excitement with me. I was so happy for him, but the feeling was short-lived as regret replaced joy. Why? I had missed the entire game because I chose to work that evening.
I knew I should have been there at his game, but I wasn’t, and not because I couldn’t have been. I could have told my manager about the game and would have been allowed to cut out early or not attend the work event at all. I had options, yet I chose to work rather than go to my son’s game. My heart broke as I realized the trade I’d made. Missing this moment in my son’s life was heartbreaking, and I look back on this moment with so much shame and regret.
I was in the early stages of my career as a pastor at a large church. The church was growing, and there always seemed to be a new initiative, vision, and event to engage people and reach the community. At the time I led the student ministry, working with sixth through twelfth grade students. There were other obligations that came with the job, including attending services and events scheduled almost every week. I worked six days a week and took Fridays off.
As the ministry grew, the church staff focused on working hard and doing more while we had momentum, and the results started rolling in. We had more and more middle school and high school students attending our Wednesday night service, and the excitement was palpable. There was something in me that kept wanting the group to get bigger and better, which meant I had to do more and more. I needed more leaders, more ideas, more help, and more time. I thought I knew what it would take, but I knew if I put my head down and got to work, I could do it. What I didn’t know was what it would take from me.
During this season, our sons were between five and ten years old. I wanted to be involved in their activities, yet there was always something to do at work, and I couldn’t be at everything.
Missing my son’s first goal was such a bummer, but it wasn’t the first or only thing I missed. I rarely went to school plays or attended meet-the-teacher events, and cheering them on at their soccer games was a luxury I often couldn’t afford. Because I chose work, that put almost all the weight of the boys on Rachael.
I justified missing these things because of what I was providing for my family. Food, clothes, and a mortgage all have a price tag. I felt like the sacrifices I was making would all pay off one day and that one day I would be more present. After all, everything I was doing was for my family, right?
Most days, I came home from work, sat down for dinner, and caught up on everyone’s day. After we ate, it was time to get ready for the next day, and the boys would get cleaned up and head to bed. Rachael and I prayed with the boys each night and told them good night. After they were asleep, Rachael and I were supposed to have time for each other, but I often found myself checking emails and replying to texts in the evenings instead of being present with her. The next day I headed off to work, and Rachael got the boys ready for school, only to do it all over again.
About the Author
Contact Links
Instagram: @joshwintermute @quiet_winters
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